Your girlfriend has her period and you suddenly don't know what to do - don't get in the way or be close? Give her time to herself or, on the contrary, give her more attention? Read about what actually happens in a woman's body during menstruation and how you can support her during this period.
The menstrual cycle in a nutshell
First of all, you will need some basic information about the menstrual cycle. This part alone may answer some of your questions, as it is not just about one week a month. The menstrual cycle is a set of hormonal changes that a woman's body goes through over the course of (approximately) one month. It consists of four phases:
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Menstrual phase: You'll probably be most familiar with your period. It usually lasts 3-7 days, but this can vary from woman to woman and even from month to month. During this phase, a woman's uterus begins to shed its lining - this is where menstrual blood comes from.
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Follicular phase : The follicular phase begins at the same time as menstruation. During this phase, a woman's reproductive hormones rise. The hormones cause the follicle containing the egg to grow and mature, and the lining of the uterus to thicken in preparation for a fertilized egg.
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Ovulation phase : During ovulation, the ovaries release a mature egg; this occurs about midway through the cycle, about 14 days before menstruation. Six to seven days before and during ovulation, a woman can become pregnant if she has unprotected sex, as sperm can survive in the female body for several days. However, ovulation does not necessarily occur on the same day of the cycle every month.
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Luteal phase : Once the egg leaves the ovary at ovulation, it travels through the fallopian tube toward the uterus. If this egg is fertilized by sperm and attaches to the uterine wall, pregnancy begins. Otherwise, the egg is reabsorbed, the uterus begins to shed its lining, and the menstrual cycle begins again.
This entire process may not always take the same amount of time. Some women have regular and clock-like menstrual cycles, but it is normal to have a cycle between 21 and 35 days.
When menstruation approaches...
Every woman experiences her menstrual cycle a little differently. But it's quite common that towards the end of the luteal phase, about a week before her period, hormonal fluctuations can trigger a series of physical and emotional changes in your partner, known as premenstrual syndrome , or PMS for short. You may experience any of the following symptoms, which usually go away with or shortly after your period.
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Fatigue and insomnia
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Skin changes, acne
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Increased appetite
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Headaches
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Cramps in the lower abdomen
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Moodiness
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Difficulty concentrating
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Changes in sexual desire
What to avoid
Before we get into tips on how to support your girlfriend during her period, let's first summarize five things to avoid.
Don't tell her she looks "tired"
Maybe it's because it's somehow related to menstruation and low hormone levels. But pointing it out won't make her feel any better and it won't cheer her up.
Don't comment on her weight (during or outside of her period)
The arrival of menstruation is often associated with increased water retention and bloating, which can make pants feel tighter than at other times of the month. While this is a natural part of fluctuating hormone levels throughout the month, for many women it can be an uncomfortable reality that they are not comfortable with. Therefore, we recommend that you do not comment on your partner's weight or body changes, not only during menstruation, but also at any other time.
Don't take menstruation lightly.
Every woman experiences menstruation differently, but the course of her period can vary from month to month. Painful cramps, mood swings, fatigue, migraines, joint pain, your partner can experience all of these during her period, and the phrases like "it can't be that bad " that women sometimes hear are simply not helpful to anyone, on the contrary. Try to be the support your friend will appreciate.
Don't talk her into being active.
If your girl is feeling tired during her period, the last thing she wants to do is go on a hike, do some spring cleaning, or socialize at a party. So don't force her into activities that will drain her energy and try to respect her needs and desires. Instead, try to come up with a compromise and schedule that works for both of you.
Don't blame everything on hormones and PMS
“Is that what you got for being so annoying?” Trust us, no woman wants to hear that. PMS encompasses a range of symptoms, including the aforementioned fatigue, irritability, and mood swings, and it’s possible that your partner’s current mood is actually due to her upcoming period. But don’t assume that any negative emotion is solely related to hormones. Whether or not menstruation or PMS is the culprit at the time, these lines usually don’t lighten the mood, even if you’re just joking.
How to be supportive of your partner
Monthly hormonal fluctuations can be a challenge for many women. But menstruation can sometimes be a challenge even for a caring partner who wants to be helpful but doesn't really know what steps to take. We're not giving you a one-size-fits-all guide, because there isn't one. But we can give you a few tips on how you can support your partner during this time to make her feel at least a little better.
Communication is key
Every woman is different, has a different cycle, and has different needs during her period and throughout her entire cycle. If you're looking for the best way to support your girlfriend, simply reach out to her and ask. Find out how she's feeling these days, how you can help her, or what activities she would most appreciate doing together.
Respect her needs.
If your girlfriend appreciates company during her period, be there for her and come up with enjoyable activities together that you both enjoy. If, on the other hand, she needs time to herself, respect that and give her space.
Create a pleasant environment
There are many ways to support your girl during her period and what activities to choose. Make her herbal tea, go for a walk, prepare or order her favorite food, or set up a home theater and watch a movie.
If your girlfriend suffers from cramps and muscle pain during her period, a hot bath or a gentle massage with Cramp Days oil , which has a warming effect and relieves muscle tension, will certainly earn you a few extra points.
Always be prepared.
Not having menstrual products on hand when you need them most is never a good idea. If you don't live in the same household as your girlfriend, make sure she has a supply of pads, tampons, or other supplies she uses at your place in case of an emergency.
If your girl prefers pads or tampons, you can treat her to a Carefree Subscription . All Femvie menstrual supplies are made from 100% certified organic cotton and the package, which automatically arrives every three months, can be customized for each woman.
And if you want some extra points , share this article with your girlfriend's best friend's partner!
You might also be interested in the Femspace blog:
- Sex during menstruation: benefits and risks
- Breast pain and tenderness: menstruation or pregnancy?
- Do we need more sleep before menstruation?
- Why is menstruation more painful and PMS worse in winter?
- Spotting and bleeding outside of menstruation
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With love
Femvie team
