Your girlfriend has her period and you suddenly don't know what to do – should you stay away or be close? Should you give her time to herself or, on the contrary, give her more attention? Read on to find out what actually happens in a woman's body during menstruation and how you can support her during this time.
Menstrual Cycle in a Nutshell
First of all, some basic information about the menstrual cycle will be helpful. This part alone might answer some of your questions, as it's not just about one week a month. The menstrual cycle is a set of hormonal changes that a woman's body goes through over (approximately) one month. It consists of four phases:
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Menstrual phase: This period of menstruation will probably be the most familiar to you. It usually lasts 3-7 days, but this can vary for each woman or even from month to month. During this phase, the woman's uterus begins to shed its lining – hence menstrual blood.
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Follicular phase: The follicular phase begins at the same time as menstruation. During this phase, female reproductive hormones rise. Under the influence of hormones, a follicle with an egg inside grows and matures, and the uterine lining thickens in preparation for a fertilized egg.
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Ovulation phase: During ovulation, the ovaries release a mature egg; this happens roughly in the middle of the cycle, about 14 days before menstruation. Six to seven days before and during ovulation, a woman can become pregnant through unprotected intercourse, as sperm can survive in the female body for several days. However, ovulation does not necessarily occur on the same day of the cycle every month.
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Luteal phase: Once the egg leaves the ovary during ovulation, it travels down the fallopian tube towards the uterus. If this egg is fertilized by sperm and attaches to the uterine wall, pregnancy begins. Otherwise, the egg is reabsorbed, the uterus begins to shed its lining, and the menstrual cycle starts anew.
This whole process doesn't always take the same amount of time. Some women have a regular and precise menstrual cycle, but it is normal to have a cycle ranging from 21–35 days.
As menstruation approaches…
Every woman experiences her menstrual cycle a little differently. However, it is quite common for hormonal fluctuations to cause a range of physical and emotional changes in your partner towards the end of the luteal phase, i.e., approximately one week before menstruation, known as premenstrual syndrome, or PMS. Some of the following symptoms may appear, which usually disappear at the beginning of menstruation or shortly thereafter.
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Fatigue and insomnia
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Skin changes, acne
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Increased appetite
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Headaches
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Cramps in the lower abdomen
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Mood swings
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Difficulty concentrating
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Changes in sexual desire
What to avoid
Before we get into tips on how you can support your girlfriend during her period, let's first summarize five points to avoid.
Don't tell her she looks "tired"
Maybe she does, because it's somehow part of menstruation and low hormone levels. But pointing it out certainly won't make her feel better or lift her spirits.
Don't comment on her weight (during menstruation or otherwise)
Menstruation is often associated with increased water retention and bloating, so pants may be tighter than on other days of the month. While this is a natural part of fluctuating hormone levels throughout the month, for many women, it can be an unpleasant reality that bothers them. Therefore, we do not recommend commenting on your partner's weight or body changes, not only during menstruation but also at any other time.
Don't downplay menstruation
Every woman experiences menstruation differently, but the course of menstruation can also vary from month to month. Painful cramps, mood swings, fatigue, migraines, joint pain - your partner may experience all of this during menstruation, and phrases like "it can't be that bad," which women sometimes hear, simply don't help anyone, quite the opposite. Try to be the support your girlfriend will appreciate.
Don't persuade her to be active
If your girlfriend feels tired during her period, the last thing she probably wants is to go hiking, do a big spring cleaning, or socialize at a party. So don't force her into activities that will require a lot of energy, and try to respect her needs and wishes. Instead, try to come up with a compromise and a program that suits both of you.
Don't blame everything on hormones and PMS
"Did you get it because you're so cranky?" Believe us, no woman wants to hear that. Premenstrual syndrome includes a number of symptoms, including the mentioned fatigue, irritability, or mood swings, and it is possible that your partner's current state is indeed due to approaching menstruation. However, don't assume that any negative emotion is exclusively related to hormones. Whether menstruation or PMS is to blame at that moment or not, similar sentences usually don't lighten the mood, even if it's just a joke on your part.
How to be a supportive partner
Monthly hormonal fluctuations can be challenging for many women. However, the period of menstruation can also sometimes be a challenge for a caring partner who wants to be helpful but doesn't really know what steps to take. We don't offer a universal guide, because there isn't one. But we can give you a few tips on how you can support your partner during this time to make her feel at least a little better.
Communication is key
Every woman is different, has a different cycle, and also has different needs during menstruation and throughout the entire cycle. If you are looking for the best way to support your girlfriend, simply approach her and ask. Find out how she feels these days, how you can help her, or what joint activities she would appreciate the most.
Respect her needs
If your girlfriend appreciates company during her period, be there for her and plan enjoyable activities that you both will like. If, on the other hand, she needs time just for herself, respect that and give her space.
Create a pleasant environment
There are many ways you can support your girlfriend during her period and what activities to choose. Make her herbal tea, go for a walk, prepare or order her favorite food, or have a movie night at home.
If your girlfriend suffers from cramps and muscle pain during menstruation, a hot bath or gentle massage with Cramp Days oil, which has warming effects and relieves muscle tension, will surely earn you some extra points.
Always be prepared
Not having menstrual products on hand when they are most needed is unpleasant. If you and your girlfriend don't live in the same household, make sure you always have a supply of sanitary pads, tampons, or other products she uses, in case of an emergency.
If your girlfriend prefers pads or tampons, you can treat her to the Carefree Subscription. All Femvie menstrual products are made from 100% certified organic cotton, and every woman can customize the contents of the package, which automatically arrives every three months, to her needs.
And if you want some extra points, share this article with your girlfriend's best friend's partner!
You might also be interested in the Femspace blog:
- Sex during menstruation: benefits and risks
- Breast pain and tenderness: menstruation or pregnancy?
- Do we need more sleep before menstruation?
- Why is menstruation more painful and PMS worse in winter?
- Spotting and bleeding outside of menstruation
Don't forget to follow us on Instagram to be the first to know about all the news on the Femspace blog or the Femvie e-shop!
With love,
the Femvie team
Femvie products that can help you
We have selected products related to this topic that can support your health:
- 🌿 BIO pads — certified organic pads without chemicals
- 🌿 BIO tampons — organic tampons made from certified organic cotton
- 💊 Magnesium — helps relieve cramps and tension before menstruation
- 🩹 Menstrual patches — natural relief from painful menstruation
- 📦 Carefree subscription — your organic menstrual products automatically every month
Frequently Asked Questions
How long does a normal period last?
A healthy period lasts 3 to 7 days. If you bleed longer or shorter repeatedly, consult a gynecologist.
Why is menstruation painful?
Menstrual cramps are caused by prostaglandins — substances that contract the uterine muscles. Magnesium, heat, exercise, or natural patches can help.
Are organic pads and tampons safer?
Yes. Organic cotton products do not contain pesticides, plastics, or bleaching chemicals commonly found in conventional menstrual products.
What affects the regularity of the menstrual cycle?
Stress, diet, exercise, sleep, and hormonal balance—all affect the length and regularity of the cycle. Tracking your cycle will help you identify patterns and any deviations.
